The covert narcissist, also known as a vulnerable narcissist, puts on an Oscar worthy performance that can fool even the most discerning individual.
The covert narcissist intentionally shuffles between different masks to evade detection.
Beneath the mask of humility lies the chilling void of an emotional predator - one cloaked in the guise of a “humble” appearing person.
While everyone around you is seemingly oblivious to what is happening, you pick up on the covert narcissist’s targeted and maniacal laughter. You are aware of the kindness that feels like a trap.
You notice the subtle gaslighting, the passive-aggressive comments and the manner in which the covert narcissist twists your words around to fit their distorted narrative.
As they continue to envelop you in a sinister game of control and manipulation, you find yourself second guessing your own reality and even begin gaslighting yourself.
When no one else is present, the covert narcissist scans you head to toe, using this unwitnessed moment to intimidate you.
When other people are present, the covert narcissist is on their “best behavior” - offering a helping hand or handing out “gifts” that they led you to believe you are unworthy of receiving.
Following an act of witnessed kindness towards you, they recount within earshot to their flying monkeys and other individuals to whom they have smeared your reputation:
“No good deed goes unpunished!”
On special occasions or outings, they calculate the perfect moment to exploit your vulnerabilities and humiliate you.
Through a carefully woven web of deceit, generosity and feigned empathy, the covert narcissist generates a level of cognitive dissonance that leaves you questioning your self worth - to the point of social isolation and even, suicidal ideation.
Only YOU seem to know the malevolent being that lurks beneath the soft spoken and “kind” appearing mask - a MONSTER with an insatiable hunger for validation and supremacy.
Sounds like a script straight out of a psychological thriller, right?
I wish it were.
As any victim of covert narcissistic abuse understands all too well - this experience is a part of their EVERYDAY reality.
Yet despite all this, the covert narcissist craftily paints the picture that the true victim is the problem.
Dr. Z, The Flying Monkey, MD
